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Imagine Johnny Pajamas Simoneau as a dispatcher for 911.

”Dispatcher Simoneau: 911, what the hell do you need.

Caller: my husband is having a heat attack.

Dispatcher Simoneau : Tell that F$G to stop faking it.

Caller: but he’s not responding

Dispatcher Simoneau: I’ll be by shortly to shoot him because I get to carry a gun.”