A fine gentleman.

If I was asked to describe Edward Leo Murphy in three words, that’s what I’d say.

Most people know Ed either by visiting Urquhart-Murphy Funeral Home on Greenwich Avenue in Warwick (which he has owned for decades), or by his yeoman’s work on the City’s Board of Canvassers, where he has served since 1984, the past 30 or so as Chairman (they should name the building after him!).

Like many of you, I of course know Ed, but under the worst of circumstances when I went to the Funeral Home to share in the grief of a family that lost a loved one.

What I didn’t know is that Ed is literally a champion for the City of Warwick.

Notwithstanding his quiet dedication to the fundamental fairness and accuracy of the electoral process, but to the impressive list of community-based organizations that he dedicates his volunteer services to (and I bet financially as well).

Organizations like the Rhode Island Central Chamber of Commerce, Leadership Warwick, The J. Arthur Trudeau Memorial Center, the Boys and Girls Clubs of Warwick, the Kent County YMCA, the CCRI Advisory Board and the Kent Hospital Corporation.

And, oh yes, he also stepped up to help his church, first at St. Catherine’s in Apponaug, and now at St. Gregory the Great.

You get the picture: A remarkable citizen.

Ed, the son of first-generation Irish Americans Bartholomew and Sarah Murphy, was born in Pawtucket and attended St. Raphael Academy, continuing his education at the New England Institute of Embalming and Sanitary Services in Boston, which later merged with Mount Ida College.

His interest in the funeral business evolved from his close relationship with his aunt and uncle, who owned a funeral home.

Asked whether he prefers to be referred to a Funeral Director or Undertaker, he politely smiled and said the former, explaining that the word Undertaker had nothing to do with digging dirt, but rather “undertaking the burden of the family”, but still preferred Funeral Director.

He continued his professional career working at the then Urquhart Mortuary in 1963 and would eventually purchase the business and property.

He didn’t have far to travel to work, purchasing the house next door.

 While some might consider being a Funeral Director (and licensed embalmer) a unique and difficult profession, because you have to deal with the most difficult days a family could have and can sometimes also be acrimonious due to conflicting opinions on how the funeral services should be, Ed acknowledged the difficulty but says, above all, “Funeral Directors are good listeners.”

“We carry out the wishes of the family.  Usually, you will find that people will genuinely listen to one another.  Their disputes can be put on the back burner.  The important thing is that you are there to help.”

He continued, “people sometimes think that Funeral Directors just drive around in big fancy cars.  We don’t.   We’re there 7 days a week, 24 hours a day, to answer a call that may be the most difficult call of their life.”

Asked what the most difficult part of the job was, he paused and said in a softer tone, “the burial of a child.   Most times caused by either a prolonged illness or a tragic accident.  You can’t imagine what it’s like.   There are no words.”

I was curious about the evolving ways funerals are conducted now, rather than the unanimity of the past.  He explained, “right now, cremations exceed traditional burials.  It’s about 60-40.   There are so many reasons for this.   Many times, families have moved apart geographically.”

“Years ago, when grandma or grandpa died, everything stopped for 4 or 5 days.  Cremation allows for a suitable service sometimes weeks or months later.”

He also remarked how important it was to attend a service.

It has been his experience that “sometimes it may not be verbally said, but it really makes a difference to the family when you take time out of your day to offer support.”

My final question regarding the funeral business was his thoughts on what seems to be a national trend of big corporations buying the neighborhood funeral homes.

“I’m not seeing it in Rhode Island, thankfully”.

Switching to the Board of Canvassers, I asked what his perceptions are of the most important process that we, as Americans, can participate in.

“We’ve always encouraged everyone to get out and vote, or use an absentee ballot, but vote!”

“It’s very simple.  If you want to bring your ideas to the process, you have to vote.   We’ve seen elections decided by less than 13 votes.”

He also gave a little insight into the process, a process that in many cities and towns have had its share of challenges and complaints.

“We follow the dictates of the State.   The State Board of Elections determines not only the process, but the rules and regulations of that process.”

He also noted some important changes that have evolved over the years.

Changes like rules and regulations affecting handicapped voters.

“People who are handicapped are now encouraged to vote by absentee ballot.  Handicapped accessibility is now mandated.”

“We try our best to see that no one is denied the right to vote.”

 As for younger voters, he said, “we pray that they realize how important it is to participate in the electoral process.   Most times the older folks do, but many times not the younger people.”

His message to the younger folks: “you can make a change.”

Finally, I wanted to know if he was thinking about retiring from either his business or his community service.

Not shockingly he said, “no!”

“As long as I can serve, I will stay.   I do have a succession plan set up to keep this company.   I think it’s important to have independent services, because it’s so much easier to make a decision.”

As for community service, don’t expect him to ride off into the sunset anytime soon.

A fine gentleman, and a model of community service.